I never have been into competition. I hate team sports that not just causes competition between your team and the team you are playing but also competition between your teammates. Maybe it is that I suck at team sports maybe it is because I do not want everyone to know how uncoordinated and clumsy I actually am.
Now when it comes to my classes, I have become a crazed competitive student! I love it though and it drives me to be a better designer. It is amazing to finally feel like I am going into a career where I will succeed and do well. It alleviates some of the fear that I have for a new career.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Diary
Painting is just another way of keeping a diary. ~Pablo Picasso
I have a blog to improve my writing skills. I think that it is a good idea to know how to express yourself in words in most aspects of life. I have always had a hard time telling stories, writing essays, and even speaking in correct English grammar. I still struggle with it. I do not tell people that I have a blog because I do not care if anyone reads it, it is purely for me to write down my thoughts and experiences like a diary.
Like Picasso says, Painting is just another way of keeping a diary. When I am painting or doing sculptures I am lost in the way that the tools feel in my hand. I see in big mass of rock what it really wants to become. As I knock off big chunks and sand away the small chunks and then the smaller chunks and sand until it begins to feel smooth to the touch, then you rub oil onto the piece and it shines. It becomes this refined and polished piece that is beautiful instead of seen as just a rock. Painting is a little different for me but I am working on helping the canvas become what it wants to become like a rock. I struggle with it and it is great to see the differences that I learn from each stroke that I make. I constantly learn things about the way that the paint spreads and the texture that I can add and the dimension of that space. I express myself in my works better than in writing but find myself struggling to become a better painter the same way I struggle to become a writer.
I think that when we stop learning to do everything in life better, we become stagnant and sterile. I hope that I will always feel like I have so much to learn.
I have a blog to improve my writing skills. I think that it is a good idea to know how to express yourself in words in most aspects of life. I have always had a hard time telling stories, writing essays, and even speaking in correct English grammar. I still struggle with it. I do not tell people that I have a blog because I do not care if anyone reads it, it is purely for me to write down my thoughts and experiences like a diary.
Like Picasso says, Painting is just another way of keeping a diary. When I am painting or doing sculptures I am lost in the way that the tools feel in my hand. I see in big mass of rock what it really wants to become. As I knock off big chunks and sand away the small chunks and then the smaller chunks and sand until it begins to feel smooth to the touch, then you rub oil onto the piece and it shines. It becomes this refined and polished piece that is beautiful instead of seen as just a rock. Painting is a little different for me but I am working on helping the canvas become what it wants to become like a rock. I struggle with it and it is great to see the differences that I learn from each stroke that I make. I constantly learn things about the way that the paint spreads and the texture that I can add and the dimension of that space. I express myself in my works better than in writing but find myself struggling to become a better painter the same way I struggle to become a writer.
I think that when we stop learning to do everything in life better, we become stagnant and sterile. I hope that I will always feel like I have so much to learn.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Love, Security, and Control
What delights us in visible beauty is the invisible. ~Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
This quote is quite true, I have learned from being married for four years and with my husband for eight years. After so many years of a relationship the compliments that came daily, have dwindled to far and few between. My husband has seen it all and truly knows me. Not that he thinks that what he has is not great and a perfect complement to him, it is that he has me. He knows how my body works and what to expect. He can read my mind without me having to say a word. There are no surprises even when I try to surprise him with something different, he expects it. It is the one drawback of being committed to someone who knows you so well. Of course, this does not detoured me from being completely happy with my marriage, it just makes those times that you get attention so much better.
I love it when I am out and I get hit on or checked out by people that I think are attractive. It reaffirms the fact that I still got it. Thankfully, Rith appreciates me being checked out too. We are not insecure in our relationship, we know that we are completely committed to each other; we know that if someone is hitting on him or me, nothing but the satisfaction of still being admired crosses our minds. When a woman hits on Rith I happily sit there and think “Yeah that is my husband! And he still has it! And he is completely mine…How great is that?!?”
Early Roman woman were hidden away and covered from head to toe, they were only allowed out for special events. They were possessions of the men. And thought that they were not in control of their emotions, they did not want their wives to open Pandora’s Box. To this day there are couples who are like this and they sadden me. It shows that there is no trust in their relationship and the commitment that they have for one another. It shows their insecurities and causes the spouse to feel like they have to be cautious about what they say. God forbid the other gets the wrong idea they stay guarded. It drives a wedge between them by the lack of trust and the feeling that they have to think about what the other will think. Even the most innocent exchanges between the opposite sex. It is one step away from covering them completely and only allowing them to leave when they are with each other.
This quote is quite true, I have learned from being married for four years and with my husband for eight years. After so many years of a relationship the compliments that came daily, have dwindled to far and few between. My husband has seen it all and truly knows me. Not that he thinks that what he has is not great and a perfect complement to him, it is that he has me. He knows how my body works and what to expect. He can read my mind without me having to say a word. There are no surprises even when I try to surprise him with something different, he expects it. It is the one drawback of being committed to someone who knows you so well. Of course, this does not detoured me from being completely happy with my marriage, it just makes those times that you get attention so much better.
I love it when I am out and I get hit on or checked out by people that I think are attractive. It reaffirms the fact that I still got it. Thankfully, Rith appreciates me being checked out too. We are not insecure in our relationship, we know that we are completely committed to each other; we know that if someone is hitting on him or me, nothing but the satisfaction of still being admired crosses our minds. When a woman hits on Rith I happily sit there and think “Yeah that is my husband! And he still has it! And he is completely mine…How great is that?!?”
Early Roman woman were hidden away and covered from head to toe, they were only allowed out for special events. They were possessions of the men. And thought that they were not in control of their emotions, they did not want their wives to open Pandora’s Box. To this day there are couples who are like this and they sadden me. It shows that there is no trust in their relationship and the commitment that they have for one another. It shows their insecurities and causes the spouse to feel like they have to be cautious about what they say. God forbid the other gets the wrong idea they stay guarded. It drives a wedge between them by the lack of trust and the feeling that they have to think about what the other will think. Even the most innocent exchanges between the opposite sex. It is one step away from covering them completely and only allowing them to leave when they are with each other.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Hitchcock...
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder. ~Alfred Hitchcock
I love summer in Utah! I tell everyone how much I love it and I just can’t explain how great it is. Not only is it (normally) perfectly hot and everyone happy because they have Vitamin B flowing in their blood but Utah has so much happening during the summer. Outdoor concerts, people out walking their dogs and talking to neighbors, and movies in the park.
For the whole month of June, my best movie maker Alfred will be showing his classic films. I think that I have seen ever movie he has ever made and has some great memories from his movies.
The first time I saw The Birds, was when I was seven. My cousins and I were at home alone while our parents went out. We had all the lights off and sat there screaming as the birds pecked out the eyes of the farmers and attacked everything moving in site. The greatest scene of the movie is when the children are running out of the school flailing their arms trying to protect themselves from getting attacked. It was filmed in Bodega Bay. I went to college an hour and a half away. Every time I went out to the coast to surf or camp or just hang out by the ocean, I would make us stop and walk up to the school and the church on the corner. I have a picture hanging on my fridge and am happy every time I see it. Sure it is corny, and sure that most likely would never happen but just for that hour we were so happy to be as scared with something as innocent as birds and that was a great relief from the real and very possible fears in our lives.
I love summer in Utah! I tell everyone how much I love it and I just can’t explain how great it is. Not only is it (normally) perfectly hot and everyone happy because they have Vitamin B flowing in their blood but Utah has so much happening during the summer. Outdoor concerts, people out walking their dogs and talking to neighbors, and movies in the park.
For the whole month of June, my best movie maker Alfred will be showing his classic films. I think that I have seen ever movie he has ever made and has some great memories from his movies.
The first time I saw The Birds, was when I was seven. My cousins and I were at home alone while our parents went out. We had all the lights off and sat there screaming as the birds pecked out the eyes of the farmers and attacked everything moving in site. The greatest scene of the movie is when the children are running out of the school flailing their arms trying to protect themselves from getting attacked. It was filmed in Bodega Bay. I went to college an hour and a half away. Every time I went out to the coast to surf or camp or just hang out by the ocean, I would make us stop and walk up to the school and the church on the corner. I have a picture hanging on my fridge and am happy every time I see it. Sure it is corny, and sure that most likely would never happen but just for that hour we were so happy to be as scared with something as innocent as birds and that was a great relief from the real and very possible fears in our lives.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Proposition 8 Upheld?!? What were they thinking?
Vote: The instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country. Ambrose Bierce
Today we heard that California Supreme Court agreed that Proposition 8 would be upheld.
It was a sad day. I get so angry about the injustice that people choose to support. Proposition 8 was passed back in November and was being reviewed by the California Supreme Court to decide if it would stand. Of course the narrow minded, dye in the wool religious hypocrites voted for this proposition and it was passed.
The California Supreme Court did not do its job and rule that this was unconstitutional. Instead they upheld this terribly bigoted law and once again showed the world that we do not live by the standards that we say that we live by.
I am a strong Christian and I am so embarrassed by the people who are claiming to be a Christian and be so judgmental. I am not sure if I believe that being Gay or Lesbian is a sin or not. I have done research on the subject from the Bible and have not seen anything that says that Sodom and Gomorrah was burnt because people were gay, I believe that it was due to the fact that the entire city was sexually corrupt. They were banging down a door trying to get the angels to rape them, which in no way does that prove that it was because they were gay.
I also believe that any sin is on the same level, for example; lying, killing, stealing, cheating, and coveting you neighbor’s things. We have no laws about lying and cheating. We encourage people to want things that other people have. Obviously there are laws about killing people. These things are all weighed differently in the land of people but to God a sin is a sin. Everything can be forgiven and he does not rate his sins from best sin to worst sin. He forgives anyone that will ask for the forgiveness. We as humans however do not punish people for lying the same as we punish people for killing.
The beliefs that I have as a Christian should be affecting only my decisions not the decisions of people who are not religious. We claim to have a separation between church and state and yet there is no separation. We do not live by the Constitution of the United States but allow this flawed system of voting. We vote based on few facts that we know, the skewed advertisements of supporters and opposition, and we even just make decisions on a name that we like. Many people are uninformed and emotional voters that allow other things like religion bias their vote.
There have been far too many groups of people that are treated unfairly and not given the same laws based on color of their skin, religion and sex. We are so proud that women got the vote. We cannot fathom discriminating people based on their race. We allow all people of any religious background to have freedom. And now we need to allow people who are Gay and Lesbians to have these same rights of everyone else.
Today we heard that California Supreme Court agreed that Proposition 8 would be upheld.
It was a sad day. I get so angry about the injustice that people choose to support. Proposition 8 was passed back in November and was being reviewed by the California Supreme Court to decide if it would stand. Of course the narrow minded, dye in the wool religious hypocrites voted for this proposition and it was passed.
The California Supreme Court did not do its job and rule that this was unconstitutional. Instead they upheld this terribly bigoted law and once again showed the world that we do not live by the standards that we say that we live by.
I am a strong Christian and I am so embarrassed by the people who are claiming to be a Christian and be so judgmental. I am not sure if I believe that being Gay or Lesbian is a sin or not. I have done research on the subject from the Bible and have not seen anything that says that Sodom and Gomorrah was burnt because people were gay, I believe that it was due to the fact that the entire city was sexually corrupt. They were banging down a door trying to get the angels to rape them, which in no way does that prove that it was because they were gay.
I also believe that any sin is on the same level, for example; lying, killing, stealing, cheating, and coveting you neighbor’s things. We have no laws about lying and cheating. We encourage people to want things that other people have. Obviously there are laws about killing people. These things are all weighed differently in the land of people but to God a sin is a sin. Everything can be forgiven and he does not rate his sins from best sin to worst sin. He forgives anyone that will ask for the forgiveness. We as humans however do not punish people for lying the same as we punish people for killing.
The beliefs that I have as a Christian should be affecting only my decisions not the decisions of people who are not religious. We claim to have a separation between church and state and yet there is no separation. We do not live by the Constitution of the United States but allow this flawed system of voting. We vote based on few facts that we know, the skewed advertisements of supporters and opposition, and we even just make decisions on a name that we like. Many people are uninformed and emotional voters that allow other things like religion bias their vote.
There have been far too many groups of people that are treated unfairly and not given the same laws based on color of their skin, religion and sex. We are so proud that women got the vote. We cannot fathom discriminating people based on their race. We allow all people of any religious background to have freedom. And now we need to allow people who are Gay and Lesbians to have these same rights of everyone else.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
An Inadequate Life...
Don’t be afraid of death as much as an inadequate life-Bertolt Brecht
Daily, I feel that my life is inadequate. That is such a sad thought but daily I sit in an office without windows and dream of a different life. I answer the few phone calls that ring on my phone and feel more and more tired each day that I turn my back on my dream.
What keeps me rooted where I am? Security and the fear of not succeeding in my dreams hold me in this place of boredom and selfishness.
I have had this pressing feeling for so many years that I need to do something more for people. I always try to help the people that I see that are homeless…I used to buy the crazy guy that rode between Napa and San Francisco meals and gave money out when I have it and sort cans for the food bank. But those few things are not enough. I have so many things to offer.
I think about buying fleece that I could make blankets. Winter is so cold here in Utah and there has been an increase in the people that come through the shelters. There is not enough beds for everyone and once it is full they sleep in stair wells or in their cars. Fleece is so cheap and all you would have to do is cut them into rectangles. It would be so easy and could save people lives.
I think about getting the leftover bagels from Einstein’s that they happily donate at the end of the day but if there is not someone to donate the extras to they are thrown in the trash. I know this because I worked there. Most of the time the donations go to PTA’s or some silly little event that the people that attend it enjoy but can go home to their full pantries and did not really need those extra calories. It would be something that would just take some ones time. There is no excuse for not being able to do this!
I went to this church recently in Denver that has transformed itself from this cold unfriendly church to one that is overflowing with members that have a true passion for loving people. Is that not what Jesus wanted us to do with our lives? They run the church services at the prison; they work with Rebuilding Together to help improve low income, elderly and disabled people’s homes. The church has become a outward focused congregation and have changed their own lives in the process. It is inspiring!
There are so many things that I could do to help people and not live this inadequate life that I live now. When am I going to overcome the fear?
Daily, I feel that my life is inadequate. That is such a sad thought but daily I sit in an office without windows and dream of a different life. I answer the few phone calls that ring on my phone and feel more and more tired each day that I turn my back on my dream.
What keeps me rooted where I am? Security and the fear of not succeeding in my dreams hold me in this place of boredom and selfishness.
I have had this pressing feeling for so many years that I need to do something more for people. I always try to help the people that I see that are homeless…I used to buy the crazy guy that rode between Napa and San Francisco meals and gave money out when I have it and sort cans for the food bank. But those few things are not enough. I have so many things to offer.
I think about buying fleece that I could make blankets. Winter is so cold here in Utah and there has been an increase in the people that come through the shelters. There is not enough beds for everyone and once it is full they sleep in stair wells or in their cars. Fleece is so cheap and all you would have to do is cut them into rectangles. It would be so easy and could save people lives.
I think about getting the leftover bagels from Einstein’s that they happily donate at the end of the day but if there is not someone to donate the extras to they are thrown in the trash. I know this because I worked there. Most of the time the donations go to PTA’s or some silly little event that the people that attend it enjoy but can go home to their full pantries and did not really need those extra calories. It would be something that would just take some ones time. There is no excuse for not being able to do this!
I went to this church recently in Denver that has transformed itself from this cold unfriendly church to one that is overflowing with members that have a true passion for loving people. Is that not what Jesus wanted us to do with our lives? They run the church services at the prison; they work with Rebuilding Together to help improve low income, elderly and disabled people’s homes. The church has become a outward focused congregation and have changed their own lives in the process. It is inspiring!
There are so many things that I could do to help people and not live this inadequate life that I live now. When am I going to overcome the fear?
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Money...
I'd like to live as a poor man with lots of money. ~Pablo Picasso
This is my dream every day. How amazing would it be to be able to not have to worry about money and live your life simply? I think that too frequently when we start to have money though, we feel that we need bigger and better things. It is a constant battle to think that you do not need anything when it is so easily obtained. I frequently wish that we would be able to raise our future children and not have to worry about affording groceries, food and house payments but never have them think that we are worry free when it comes to money.
I remember when we were growing up; we did not have many toys. The toys that we did have were presents from birthdays or Christmas not a daily occurrence. I remember being so poor that my parents worried about paying their bills. Once my mom lost our $70.00 in the grocery store, she looked all over and could not find it. It was the money that we had for food and without it we would not be able to buy food. The manager that was working at that store gave my mom her groceries. As our life went on, we were fortunate enough to have parents who were able to make more and be less worried about buying groceries and paying their bills.
The little amount of money that we had enriched our lives, we were so creative, active, and happy with what we had. I never thought that we were really missing out on things when I did not get the toy that I may have wanted. When I see the way that people are raised today it makes me mad. These teenagers that walk around without any respect for anyone or anything, have such entitlement issues. They expect teachers to bend over backwards for them to help them pass their classes. They bring in a quarters worth of assignments at the end of the year and expect it to be accepted so they can graduate. And the worst part is that they get away with it. No Child Left Behind only furthers this mentality. It teaches people that people will make accommodations for them so that the school district will not look bad. It teaches them that even if they have not learned what they need to have learned they will pass a class. Kids in stores make me sick and parents make me sick. I see parents who are so lazy that they ignore what their children are doing. They allow the children to run around going into people’s bedrooms, scream through the halls and break valuable things. If the parents don’t completely ignore the children or leave the room, then they say in their very nicest voice “gentle, gentle”. Umm…no, it should be “Do Not Touch that is not yours!” I am baffled frequently by them. My greatest fear is that I will be a parent who is like that. They teach these children at a young age that they are in control and that their parents are wet fish that they can push around and get whatever they want. We are raising a generation of children that have no compassion for others and are so self absorbed that they do not care if people are in need.
If I had no worries when it comes to money, I would volunteer at schools to teach art and art history. I would work on developing my company, I would take time to help people and focus on others rather than myself. I would spend time with the people that are important to me. Oh yeah and I would travel the world. I do not ask for much, do I?
This is my dream every day. How amazing would it be to be able to not have to worry about money and live your life simply? I think that too frequently when we start to have money though, we feel that we need bigger and better things. It is a constant battle to think that you do not need anything when it is so easily obtained. I frequently wish that we would be able to raise our future children and not have to worry about affording groceries, food and house payments but never have them think that we are worry free when it comes to money.
I remember when we were growing up; we did not have many toys. The toys that we did have were presents from birthdays or Christmas not a daily occurrence. I remember being so poor that my parents worried about paying their bills. Once my mom lost our $70.00 in the grocery store, she looked all over and could not find it. It was the money that we had for food and without it we would not be able to buy food. The manager that was working at that store gave my mom her groceries. As our life went on, we were fortunate enough to have parents who were able to make more and be less worried about buying groceries and paying their bills.
The little amount of money that we had enriched our lives, we were so creative, active, and happy with what we had. I never thought that we were really missing out on things when I did not get the toy that I may have wanted. When I see the way that people are raised today it makes me mad. These teenagers that walk around without any respect for anyone or anything, have such entitlement issues. They expect teachers to bend over backwards for them to help them pass their classes. They bring in a quarters worth of assignments at the end of the year and expect it to be accepted so they can graduate. And the worst part is that they get away with it. No Child Left Behind only furthers this mentality. It teaches people that people will make accommodations for them so that the school district will not look bad. It teaches them that even if they have not learned what they need to have learned they will pass a class. Kids in stores make me sick and parents make me sick. I see parents who are so lazy that they ignore what their children are doing. They allow the children to run around going into people’s bedrooms, scream through the halls and break valuable things. If the parents don’t completely ignore the children or leave the room, then they say in their very nicest voice “gentle, gentle”. Umm…no, it should be “Do Not Touch that is not yours!” I am baffled frequently by them. My greatest fear is that I will be a parent who is like that. They teach these children at a young age that they are in control and that their parents are wet fish that they can push around and get whatever they want. We are raising a generation of children that have no compassion for others and are so self absorbed that they do not care if people are in need.
If I had no worries when it comes to money, I would volunteer at schools to teach art and art history. I would work on developing my company, I would take time to help people and focus on others rather than myself. I would spend time with the people that are important to me. Oh yeah and I would travel the world. I do not ask for much, do I?
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
What a Waste of Time!
I just finished all the Twilight Books. I remember being young and reading these no substance romance books. And I admit that I read a series that was so sappy and heart wrenching, but they never made the obsessive craze that these books have. What a bunch of fluff. Not only did the author try too hard but her writing was a sad attempt at quality. It is as sad as The Da Vinci Code without the interesting research.
I am mostly sad that girls are still surrounding them selves with books that have no redeeming quality to them. They read this fluff and think that that is what life is about, it never prepares them for the real world and the have very strange expectations of Happily Ever After. What shit! Can we not read books like Little Women that is about the girls making better choices? About wanting a career, learning how hard it is too be married, about death, and shaping your character into something good instead of your body.
Lastly, these books bugged me because I wasted a total of 2560 on something that could have fit into at least half that. I wasted about a month reading them and do not feel smarter for doing so!
I am mostly sad that girls are still surrounding them selves with books that have no redeeming quality to them. They read this fluff and think that that is what life is about, it never prepares them for the real world and the have very strange expectations of Happily Ever After. What shit! Can we not read books like Little Women that is about the girls making better choices? About wanting a career, learning how hard it is too be married, about death, and shaping your character into something good instead of your body.
Lastly, these books bugged me because I wasted a total of 2560 on something that could have fit into at least half that. I wasted about a month reading them and do not feel smarter for doing so!
Monday, November 10, 2008
To Say Something or Not
In the past I have worked in the positions are really the catch all to the terrible jobs that no one wants to do. This job that I currently have is no different. I am assigned jobs that no one wants to do but everyone has an opinion about. It is so frustrating to go through all this work and be told to do it and then people get involved and change things. What is more frustrating is to not be told that things are being changed. In the three months that I have worked here it has happened in almost ever project that I have done. Do they really think that it is fine to go behind my back and do this? So...I am struggling with standing up for myself and saying that it is disrespectful and rude to do this or to sit by and allow it to happen time and time again. This was one of the big issues that I had at my previous job and I was so miserable there. I do not care at all about this company but still would like to stand up for myself. What to do?
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Karma bite you in the ass!
I have these neighbors who have been nothing but terrible. So terrible that I am afraid that they will poison my dog. So it all started when we moved in and were hooking up cable. The cable guy unhooked their cable because it was on our side of the fence. Well they got all worked up and called the police. Like they do not have anything better to do than worry about someones cable being unhooked for two seconds. What ever!
Anyway so we are moving into a new place. We called to change over the gas to our new house and they came to turn off our gas at our old place. We came back over last night at 10:30 and they are standing on out side of the house with a person from the gas company. Apparently, the gas company shut off both of the units. They were so angry about it that they would not even answer us when we asked what was happening. Ha Ha. I think that they deserve what they get!
Anyway so we are moving into a new place. We called to change over the gas to our new house and they came to turn off our gas at our old place. We came back over last night at 10:30 and they are standing on out side of the house with a person from the gas company. Apparently, the gas company shut off both of the units. They were so angry about it that they would not even answer us when we asked what was happening. Ha Ha. I think that they deserve what they get!
Monday, August 11, 2008
So Much Happening
It always seems like everything happens all at once. I get a new job and we move. Life goes for so long being calm and peaceful and then suddenly I have a million things to do all at the same time. I spent the weekend painting and getting thing ready to move our stuff in. I am excited to be moving there. It is nice because we are making the inside look like it is a brand new house full of our style. Well almost...I would have definitely gone for some more funky colors as accents but it is not our home and we will do what we can to add our style into the house.
I also just got a new job and am starting at the beginning of next week so between moving and the stress of starting at a new place I am exhausted. But the end result will be well worth the stress and busyness.
I also just got a new job and am starting at the beginning of next week so between moving and the stress of starting at a new place I am exhausted. But the end result will be well worth the stress and busyness.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Weekends
I love weekends so much, they are my favorite time of my life. Friday night we are usually completely selfish. We stay at home and watch a movie eat dinner and drink wine. We sit outside in our back yard and play chess or just go for walks. Nothing is better to start off a weekend as time just for yourself.
Every morning the first thing that comes into my head is coffee. I love coffee and live on coffee. It is pathetic I know but oh well. So Saturday morning we wake up take a little walk, with Maddie, to get coffee Enjoy our latte on the way home taking new routes around the neighborhoods and end up at home. We go to church eat lunch with the family and then go out.
Sunday is breakfast at one of our favorite spots. We always take our time and maybe go to Barnes and Noble to check out books and magazines. Then Rith goes to work and I have the afternoon to my self. I love that time too. It is full of cleaning, laundry, laying in the sun, and being lazy. About five the depression hits me that it is all over and I have to go back to work again...but then I will have another weekend after five short days of work.
Every morning the first thing that comes into my head is coffee. I love coffee and live on coffee. It is pathetic I know but oh well. So Saturday morning we wake up take a little walk, with Maddie, to get coffee Enjoy our latte on the way home taking new routes around the neighborhoods and end up at home. We go to church eat lunch with the family and then go out.
Sunday is breakfast at one of our favorite spots. We always take our time and maybe go to Barnes and Noble to check out books and magazines. Then Rith goes to work and I have the afternoon to my self. I love that time too. It is full of cleaning, laundry, laying in the sun, and being lazy. About five the depression hits me that it is all over and I have to go back to work again...but then I will have another weekend after five short days of work.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Hot Tomato Red and a Lot of Money Continued
I now have blisters all over my stomach! Four days later. I feel like I have some crazy skin disease and may soon have cancer.
Hot Tomato Red and a Lot of Money
We went to LA for a long weekend...
Here are the pros (because i try to be an optimist)
1. I met new cousins and they were fun.
2. We went to the beach.
3. The air was clear and temperature was warm.
The Con's
1. Expensive! Driving, Vegas, coffee all the time.
2. We sat at the adult table...We could only just see our other cousins having fun.
3. Long trip home.
4.Oh and my stomach is bright red! I have never been so burnt.
Here are the pros (because i try to be an optimist)
1. I met new cousins and they were fun.
2. We went to the beach.
3. The air was clear and temperature was warm.
The Con's
1. Expensive! Driving, Vegas, coffee all the time.
2. We sat at the adult table...We could only just see our other cousins having fun.
3. Long trip home.
4.Oh and my stomach is bright red! I have never been so burnt.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Walk like a Grandma...
Sunday morning, after two days of running and I am hunched over and my hips hurt. I am walking like a grandma. We finished the race in 27 hours and our average was 9 minutes and 15 seconds per mile. Not too bad. We were thinking it would be about 10 and a half minutes per mile.
The running was grueling...sitting in the car okay...and finish line fantastic! I ran at 6:30 p.m., 3:30 a.m., and noon. We were able to take a nap for a while Friday night but then we used an office in Midway to lie down and that was so nice until we woke up and realized it was not over yet we had one last leg of the race to do. That was the most chalenging part of the entire race, getting to relax and sleep and then wake up and not want to move let alone start running again. I was a big baby about it.
People were so great along the last leg of the race. It was along roads in this little town and everyone was out with their hoses spraying us down offering us water and cheering us on. That helped so much because it was so hot. As soon as I finished the last leg, I had so much energy and wanted to help the other runners too. I was out spraying them with squirt bottles and getting people water.
Rith was our last runner and it was so great to see him coming over the hill onto the field to meet us all and run into the finish line together. It was so great knowing that we all finished this challenge and did well at it.
We are already talking about next year but I will make sure that I streach more after the races and then I will not feel like an old lady.
The running was grueling...sitting in the car okay...and finish line fantastic! I ran at 6:30 p.m., 3:30 a.m., and noon. We were able to take a nap for a while Friday night but then we used an office in Midway to lie down and that was so nice until we woke up and realized it was not over yet we had one last leg of the race to do. That was the most chalenging part of the entire race, getting to relax and sleep and then wake up and not want to move let alone start running again. I was a big baby about it.
People were so great along the last leg of the race. It was along roads in this little town and everyone was out with their hoses spraying us down offering us water and cheering us on. That helped so much because it was so hot. As soon as I finished the last leg, I had so much energy and wanted to help the other runners too. I was out spraying them with squirt bottles and getting people water.
Rith was our last runner and it was so great to see him coming over the hill onto the field to meet us all and run into the finish line together. It was so great knowing that we all finished this challenge and did well at it.
We are already talking about next year but I will make sure that I streach more after the races and then I will not feel like an old lady.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Twas The Night Before the Big Race...
and all through the house, we are searching for all the little things that is needed. Running clothes? Check. Shoes? Check. Ipod? Check. Entertainment for our car time? Check.
Two days ago, I descovered that I really get irritated by change. What? Me? I have certain people on my team and even though they are 40, they are so afraid that they are not going to be in their cars with their friends. Are we sure that they are old enough to run this race or are they 12? Whatever. So we have rearranged ourselves and changed the legs that we are running. It makes no difference to them that we have been training for the legs that we had and that we had picked them months ago. Rith has a different leg that is much different than his previous ones and well I get the easiest leg of the race.
I am kinda disappointed in that. It is just not the same satisfaction in my mind. Oh well...I will get it over with in two days and I am sure that we will have a great time no matter what.
Two days ago, I descovered that I really get irritated by change. What? Me? I have certain people on my team and even though they are 40, they are so afraid that they are not going to be in their cars with their friends. Are we sure that they are old enough to run this race or are they 12? Whatever. So we have rearranged ourselves and changed the legs that we are running. It makes no difference to them that we have been training for the legs that we had and that we had picked them months ago. Rith has a different leg that is much different than his previous ones and well I get the easiest leg of the race.
I am kinda disappointed in that. It is just not the same satisfaction in my mind. Oh well...I will get it over with in two days and I am sure that we will have a great time no matter what.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Wasatch Back
What was I thinking?!? You say do you want to run a race and I will say sure even before I know details. That happened to me two months ago. "Hey Nichola, so do you and Rith want to run Wasatch Back?" "Yeah sign us up!". Later we would find out the information about it. First, that it is a relay race that will last us what 30 hours and 180.5 miles. Second, it costs us over a hundred dollars each(we could have paid for almost all the concerts that we wanted to go to with that money and danced the same calories away). And lastly, we do not have very much time to train. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Well the race is coming up on Friday. I am trying to be ready for the whole thing and I guess that I will see how prepared I am for it on Friday. It did get me up off my lazy ass and started running again. I am now at that point that I miss running if I skip a day and that is nice to be back to that feeling. I am hoping that when I go out to California no one will ask me if I am pregnant...I guess that that is the best thing that will come out of doing this race. Well that and the bragging rights! I will get pictures up of it next week.
Well the race is coming up on Friday. I am trying to be ready for the whole thing and I guess that I will see how prepared I am for it on Friday. It did get me up off my lazy ass and started running again. I am now at that point that I miss running if I skip a day and that is nice to be back to that feeling. I am hoping that when I go out to California no one will ask me if I am pregnant...I guess that that is the best thing that will come out of doing this race. Well that and the bragging rights! I will get pictures up of it next week.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
I almost fell off the treadmill...
I was so happy the other day when I was running on the treadmill at the gym. I should never be overly emotional on the treadmill because I just forget what I am doing. I was not planning on becoming emotional but there on the news was people getting married. All these gay and lesbians finally getting married. I was so happy for them and the United States that I almost started to cry! My eyes were all blurry and I was so distracted that I was not focusing on running straight and caught the edge of the treadmill and crashed into the handle bar.
My pain was worth it though. I am so happy that people are allowed to be who they are and the discrimination that has been happening against gay people has been so frustrating. I have been a Christian all my life and really took time to figure out what I thought about the religion and issues and Bible. Well my conclusion has always been that Jesus kicked it with people that were seen as sinful. Prostitutes, liars, and even someone that he knew would betray him and cause him to be killed. That in my book means that Jesus would have hung out with me, the drug dealer on the corner and any other person who does not fit into the perfect category.
My pain was worth it though. I am so happy that people are allowed to be who they are and the discrimination that has been happening against gay people has been so frustrating. I have been a Christian all my life and really took time to figure out what I thought about the religion and issues and Bible. Well my conclusion has always been that Jesus kicked it with people that were seen as sinful. Prostitutes, liars, and even someone that he knew would betray him and cause him to be killed. That in my book means that Jesus would have hung out with me, the drug dealer on the corner and any other person who does not fit into the perfect category.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Sex and The City
I do not think that men get Sex and The City...As I watched the movie I realized that they just could not understand the impact that that show made on the women who watched the show. The pressure to get married and saying good bye to all you married friends as one by one they get married. I remember the feeling that I had when my best friend was married. I had this strong bond with her and knew that everything was changing. Weddings of our friends are not happy...we are happy that they have found someone but we have to say goodbye to those times that they rely on you. This may be selfish but OK...It is important that your friend needs to hang out with someone when she is heart broken and alone and the husband takes your spot. We never were too busy with guys to hang out with our girl friends and if they were we sure did not like them. We loved to get together as much as we could and talk about anything. Guys think that the women on Sex and the City were so dirty but if they were to listen to conversations that women have they would realize that we do talk about sex the good the bad and the very bad. That is the appeal of Sex and the City, those girls stick together no matter what and are able to say anything to each other. That is every woman's dream to have girl friends that they can brag about their guys to, have around when their worlds come apart, and laugh with about all their lessons learned. Plus they may not be hot...but they sure know how to carry themselves and believe that they are fabulous!
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Eight Years Ago...
I went though the most traumatic and greatest time of my life eight years ago today and that is a cause for celebration. Eight years ago tonight I was calling my dad at 10:30 to tell him terrible news. The experience of giving your parents some of the scariest news that they could hear was life changing. It shook our family to the core. We had tragedy happen around us that effected us greatly but never directly in our family.
I lived in California going to school at a private college and was alone in the middle of so many people who claimed that they were friends. I could not stay there any longer and was packing to leave. It did not matter where I went I just had to go. I was finished packing and I got a call from Rith. He was running around the forest on shrooms and had no idea what was happening in my life but had a sense that he needed to call me. Before that night we had been just close friends after that night my world changed. I married this man who has been so connected with my thoughts and emotions that he knows when I need him automatically and I do not have to say a word. I had given up on guys and that is when my life changed and we fell in love. We are a strange couple and everyone can see it. I glow when I am around him. I do not talk about the things that happened that night except to him. It is a bitter sweet memory but one that has caused amazing things to happen in my life.
I lived in California going to school at a private college and was alone in the middle of so many people who claimed that they were friends. I could not stay there any longer and was packing to leave. It did not matter where I went I just had to go. I was finished packing and I got a call from Rith. He was running around the forest on shrooms and had no idea what was happening in my life but had a sense that he needed to call me. Before that night we had been just close friends after that night my world changed. I married this man who has been so connected with my thoughts and emotions that he knows when I need him automatically and I do not have to say a word. I had given up on guys and that is when my life changed and we fell in love. We are a strange couple and everyone can see it. I glow when I am around him. I do not talk about the things that happened that night except to him. It is a bitter sweet memory but one that has caused amazing things to happen in my life.
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